Heart and Mind

 Athena Hemming

So you're looking for a counsellor, it's hard to know where to start isn't it? Every professional has their own unique personality as well as chosen approaches and tools to help. On top of that both life and work experience are significant.

So,I'd like to introduce myself and tell you a little bit about me, so that hopefully you can choose the right counsellor.

I had a very rich work life up until I became a mum at the age of 41. [See history]. I considered myself extremely lucky to have been able to be the at-home parent until my kids were in their late teens. This I mostly enjoyed (well, all parenting has its moments, doesn't it) and included having chickens and rabbits and growing sugar snap peas. But then, I was also very happy returning to work in 2019. I've always loved what I do and feel passionate about personal growth or our individual and shared evolutions. Since I can remember, my interests were seen through eyes that prioritised communication and self awareness. This is still true today!

WHAT YOU GET
To cut a long story short I've had loads of experiences. Some of them more common, others very unusual. For instance I was lowered into a huge crevasse so that other people could practice ice rescuing. To this day I still can't describe that adequately. My therapy started at 16 when I left school to go to university to study psychology. I knew I needed help and desperately wanted to change. After achieving academic qualifications I realized that I was more of an experiential learner and so, set about getting as many experiences of therapy and growing as I could over many years. So having been alive since 1960 I have accumulated a useful number of skills and understandings. I am whole-heartedly attracted to increasing consciousness and love every moment of everyday! 

WHAT HAPPENS
So what happens in a session? Yes, we talk! The first thing I will do is ask you what you'd like to work on and if anything in particular has brought you through my door. I always try and do something useful in the first session so that you get to know me a bit and hopefully walk away with something different to think about. I am down to earth, compassionate, plain speaking, highly motivated and surprisingly open to finding moments of lightheartedness where ever we can! Sessions are an active process for me. I share ideas, techniques and beliefs, and it is your choice what you take away and what you discard. I may well question, challenge and clarify with you the perceptions and understandings you have about your life and life in general. 

WHO COMES
Most of my clients come from the Hutt Valley, and most either come as a couple or as individuals, although I also see  family combinations. These days I see slightly more returning clients than I do new ones, although I do get excited about meeting new people. As I said I love what I do, being constructive in the processes of change.

It is often a crisis and pain of some sort that forces us to take stock of what we've experienced, to process and find a fuller understanding of who we are and what we've gained.
It is also true that people under stress very often  revert to automatic and unconscious behaviours and thoughts. These same automatic and unconscious thoughts and actions control a lot of our life day-to-day experiences.  [Happy and contented people don't feel motivated to face their fears or underlying assumptions and beliefs about how to live life].
In a nut shell stressful times are a great time to change and evolve ourselves! To become happier,more loving, more understanding, more caring (of people and our planet), more accepting, more at peace.... To mature. 
Whatever you are grappling with at home, if you are stuck on how to make it easier or better, I might very well be able to help. One hour (a session) could enhance your communication skills, adapt your personal goals, clarify your relationships or help you find a new direction (oh, it can take more than one session but that's up to you!)  

 IN SUMMARY
Whatever the reason, I will assume a client wants change. I work with people from all walks of life, from students to executives, pensioners to plumbers, business owners to full-time mums. People come to me for a variety of reasons including feeling sad, or stressed, or having reached a crisis in their life, or after months of feeling misunderstood in a relationship. I see many couples; from those who are basically doing OK but want to refresh their communication skills to those who are about to break up and want to tick the “We’ve tried everything box”! Oh! and I really love working with young people (15-20).
Whatever the troubles  I see everyone as a whole human being (with strengths, weaknesses, potentials, fears, wounds and  skills etc). I've been trusted with many experiences by clients over the years from being abducted by aliens (Who am I to say this didn't happen) to some pretty abominable human behaviour. Some have called me gullible,  I prefer the word  open :-)
I always follow up at the next session. The more clients think about what we discuss in sessions, or try out new ways of behaving, the more they will get out of our time together. If a client comes once a fortnight (this might be what they can most comfortably afford), there will be work to do in between sessions digesting, integrating and deepening what we have talked about.
People don't always come to me because they are in crisis. Let me use an analogy: think of me as a book. A resource. For instance, parents contact me to ask if I can help their young people (children) with life. The subject of concern might be bullying, it could be anxiety, it could be a medical event. As an outsider I can say things that friends or family might be afraid to say for fear of hurting a loved one. I can offer  perspectives that might never have been thought about before. They are put on the table as ideas that can be taken or left, with no pressure. But I am better than a book because I have an automatically self-adapting user interface! I will naturally adjust to those I'm sitting with to try and offer the most relevant approach! There :) The most modern and up-to-date technology available: a real human with heart and humour.

Note:If you are using weed more than socially, sessions will only help if you stop for the duration of us working together.